So this is it. This is a low.
I am observing it and this is what I feel:
-frustration
-helplessness
-jealousy
-ignorance
-culture shock
-pathetic
-not included
The good news is I saw those friendly faces again at that house on 58th street, and that I made it through a GRE practice test, finally. The good news is that I have a place to stay tonight and that I had delicious chili for breakfast, lunch, and dinner. The good news is that coconut pouchong tea is one of the best I've ever had the privilege of trying. That I have a bike. That my family is safe. That I am safe, and that there is someone who loves me.
But this is how I feel, and tears are welling up in my eyes. I can't seem to come to terms with these feelings, no matter how much I meditate on them. I notice them, they're there, and I am having a hard time.
Total time meditated today: 50 minutes.
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